Oct 09 2008
Love and Marriage
Love and Marriage
Go together like a horse and carriage…
I was on the phone to an old work colleague earlier and she asked when I would give her the opportunity to buy a new hat. I told her she’ll be waiting a while.
So, let’s hear your thoughts on marriage. In an age where the divorce rate is ever increasing and the average age when people tie the knot is going up and up. Since 2002 the divorce rate has gone up 70%. Is Ireland turning its back on marriage, now that ‘living in sin’ is now the preferred choice? In a state where those who can’t marry are campaigning for it and those who are married are trying to get out of it, where do you stand on it?
I personally have no problem with it, but don’t think it’s for me. I grew up seeing many of my friends’ parents separating and it became common place very quickly. More common however was the number of clearly failed marriages that stayed together out of apathy, fear of change or ‘for the kids’. I never saw marriage as a positive option, something to look forward to, and I still don’t. It always seemed to me to be part of a forced and institutionalised system and never about love, commitment or loyalty.
I understand what marriage is for. I do know that some people get married so they can publicly declare their devotion to another person, but it seems now to me more about the ‘big day’ than all the days that come after it. If marriage is so important to people then why don’t more people have smaller private ceremonies. Instead, we have ever aggrandised titanic weddings (I’m using the word to its fullest) – weddings that are bigger and bigger and increasingly doomed to hit the proverbial iceberg.
I don’t think I’m being particularly cynical here. I don’t understand the huge expense that goes into these events and I definitely don’t see how they can ever symbolise what the marriage is supposed to be – a long term commitment to someone you love. I know a few married people and while some of them seem very happy with married life, more do not and have actively sought divorces. And yet this does not put them off the institution.
I don’t know. I haven’t fully formed my thoughts on the subject yet, but I do know that I would rather spend all of that money on doing up the apartment, taking a long holiday, buying a new car, anything rather than forking out thousands upon thousands for one day of drunken dancing (fun as it may be).
I’d love to hear what others think on this. Am I a cynic? Am I wide of the mark? Enlighten me.