May 15 2008

The Man Bag

Published by at 1:45 am under Blog

I have a manbag! Yes, I am one of those metrosexual, fashion conscious, manbag-wearing men.

No, it does not contain make-up. It does not have compartments full of cleanser, moisturiser or foundation. I do not carry a spare pair of “comfortable” shoes around, nor do I have “overnight” clothes. My diary is not in there; my most recent birthday cards are not tucked away for safekeeping; my list of gifts for people who I might buy gifts for if there was an occassion for which I should by gifts for these people for for…is not in this bag.

It contains my Filofax. It has numerous pens. I have a multimedia card reader in one of the compartments. It houses my glasses (my sunglasses when I wear my regular glasses, my regular glasses when I wear my sunglasses). I have many cables – a standard USB cable, my phone charger, my camera charger, my iPod cable. It plays host to Darragh‘s external harddrive and cable (I should probably return that).

It is full of pages – printed blogs, because I didn’t have time to read them in work, so I read them on the train; a collection of post such as bills and statements which I should file away at home but keep forgetting to do; le craic’s Blog Awards book which I keep meaning to give to Lottie; and lots of random crap, much of which I’m not even sure where it came from.

I have a manbag. I need a manbag! How did the Irish male function pre-metrosexuality? Though I’m sure I’ve just landed myself on Grandad‘s list of “people I hate just because…”, I cannot give up on this vital tool. We spend 12 to 16 years or more carting around our school and college books, copies, lecture papers and notes – it’ hard to become pocket people.

My dad is a pocket person. He carries his keys, his wallet, his phone, his loose change, his lotto ticket, his tissue and his packet of chewing gum in two pockets. Young women say to him, “is that a phone in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?” The answer is depressingly predictable.

In fact, my father only recenty invested in a wallet – an improvement on just throwing his cash, his ATM card and his change in the one pocket. How do these people cope?

In my wallet I have my ATM card, two credit cards, my Cineworld card, my annual Bus and Rail Card (and my stupid CIE card with a grinning fool on it), my student card, my loyalty card to Zumo, my loyalty card to SoBo, my Starbucks card, my Hughes and Hughes gift card, my (apparently out of date) HMV studen card, numerous random business cards, my own Moo cards, several receipts and a note reminding me of a dental appointment (21st August at 12.30).

I have manbag and I could not live without it. As I sit on the DART, attempting to clear out all the crap from it, I realise there is more stuff in it that I need to keep than there is junk I can afford to cast away.

I have a manbag – don’t judge me!

21 responses so far

21 Responses to “The Man Bag”

  1. Darraghon 15 May 2008 at 6:47 am

    Darren, do you have a man bag?

  2. Grandadon 15 May 2008 at 9:44 am

    You sit on the DART and root through it? You play with your bag in public? That is sad. That is sick.

    Either you go the whole hog and start wearing high heels, or you go on the hit list.

  3. Darrenon 15 May 2008 at 9:49 am

    @Grandad I’m I reading this right? Do you want to see me in high heels? 😮

  4. Grandadon 15 May 2008 at 9:54 am

    If you’re carrying a bag around, you might as well be. Real men only carry bags for one reason – to hold the ammunition.

  5. Darrenon 15 May 2008 at 10:03 am

    @Grandad This is my rifle, this is my gun…

  6. Grannymaron 15 May 2008 at 10:51 am

    Now this MAN BAG is it the right colour, size and shape?

  7. Victoriaon 15 May 2008 at 10:54 am

    I love this, my boyfriend also has a “man bag” and I joke about how he is so metropolitan. It’s awesome, it means that I can store my purse/essential makeup in it when we’re going out.

  8. Darrenon 15 May 2008 at 10:54 am

    @GM I decline to answer for fear that Grandad might have me lynched.

    @Victoria Is it revenge of sorts? I used to dump everything into Lottie’s bag before I got mine. Still, hers is much bigger – she could live out of hers for a week. (Love your website’s name by the way!!)

  9. emordinoon 15 May 2008 at 11:55 am

    Nothin’ metro about a manbag. If it’s good enough for Jack Bauer, it’s good enough for me.

  10. John Bon 15 May 2008 at 12:38 pm

    I resisted for a long time but I don’t know how people of any sex function without bags! Mine typically contains lunch, books, phone, keys, wallet, pens. Optional: camera, hat, brolly, gameboy, penknife, ammunition, torch. One of those is made up.

    And don’t get me started on wallets 🙂

  11. Darren.. tooon 15 May 2008 at 2:06 pm

    This is something that has me going around in circles. I have too much crap for my pockets, but not enough to own and carry a man bag.

    I mean all I have is my phone, wallet and keys. I dont want to have a small little purse size bag, thats just too metro sexual.

    Jim can you fix it for me?

  12. Jimboon 15 May 2008 at 2:08 pm

    Anything that feels the need to have the prefix man- just plain isn’t meant for a man.

    If it was a real bag, for a real man, then it would just be called a bag.

    man-anything = campness.

  13. Darrenon 15 May 2008 at 2:16 pm

    @Emordino Damn right! I also keep my direct link to CTU in my manbag!

    @John lmao – My wallet doesn’t tend to have anything unusual in it. Although it rarely has any money in it – is that unusual?

    @Jimbo Shit, that’s a good argument. What about manboobs? Nope, that’s not good either…

    (@Elordino & @John @Jimbo Welcome to the blog!)

    @D2 Yeah, I was at that stage for a long time, but it’s easy to cross that line if you start bringing books with you. I always have a book or two with me.

  14. Anthonyon 15 May 2008 at 2:23 pm

    You’ve just reminded me to clean out my own bag.
    It’s a huge duffel bag for the gym though so doesn’t really count as a man bag…. I hope.
    Oh and subscriptions++

  15. Daveon 15 May 2008 at 6:54 pm

    Just came back from Italy, France and Spain. All blokes there have man bags. Really wanted to get one but was told that I’d be beaten up if I got one here.

    Thanks for making a stand and coming out as it were!

  16. le craicon 15 May 2008 at 10:05 pm

    I had a man bag but it wasn’t big enough and the strap broke. Now I have a small(ish) rucksack. It carries my lunch, water, keys, book, newspaper – gadgets etc. I don’t use wallets at all.

  17. Rickon 16 May 2008 at 12:16 am

    I could do an itinerary of what’s in mine but it’d be easier to find the Lost Ark Of The Covenant… Suffice to say that it has Geek and Fluffy badges on the outside.

  18. Davidon 20 May 2008 at 9:41 am

    Doesn’t Indiana Jones have a man bag anyway??

  19. Darrenon 20 May 2008 at 11:27 am

    @Rick I’ll have to get me some of them badges. At the moment, I’ve only got a fading WWMD sticker.

    @David That’s a damn good point! If Indiana Jones can have one, so can I!!!

  20. Davidon 21 May 2008 at 2:31 pm

    Darren, that’s what I keep telling myself…

  21. Katieon 28 Nov 2010 at 6:01 am

    This comments are so historical – LOL.

    As long as your manbag is not pink then I think you good to go 🙂

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